Today I learnt:
To inch forward, endlessly
Today I am grateful:
To people who help on purpose, in any circumstance, with any consequence
Today I need:
To just breathe at a pace and get through another day, intact
Today I forgive:
Whatever happened historically to generate this momentum, that I was swept up into at birth and can't act upon in the present
Dear Exposure
-
Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Last edited by Beany Boo on July 3rd, 2016, 4:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
-
Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Today I learnt:
I'm supposed to know what to do. I thought I was just supposed to successfully hide that I really don't.
Today I am grateful:
To anyone who shows me I belong here as I hideously am
Today I need:
To do nothing to stop them if my feelings kick in; let them dance the ducky dance
Today I forgive:
Work and education for hijacking my curiousity
I'm supposed to know what to do. I thought I was just supposed to successfully hide that I really don't.
Today I am grateful:
To anyone who shows me I belong here as I hideously am
Today I need:
To do nothing to stop them if my feelings kick in; let them dance the ducky dance
Today I forgive:
Work and education for hijacking my curiousity
Last edited by Beany Boo on June 30th, 2016, 1:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
-
Imissmysun
- Posts: 282
- Joined: June 29th, 2016, 5:44 am
- Gender: Female
- Issues: Anxiety, Depression, past trauma healing,
- preferred pronoun: she
- Location: Central New York
Re: Dear Exposure
This is an awesome post -
I will need to read it about 50 more times to truly digest its genius
I will need to read it about 50 more times to truly digest its genius
Just another messed up chick, who hates her body and face, and voice, and thinks she is useless and her stuff isn't that bad and she should get over it.
-Sarah St. Lunatic
-Sarah St. Lunatic
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Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Imissmysun,
Thank you
Thank you
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
-
Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Today I learnt:
To listen, at all, to the words other people are saying; instead of for everything else that might be about to go down
Today I am grateful:
For aeroplane and hospital food. A person, not me, is feeding me a reasonable meal at an appointed time regardless of where we are
Today I need:
To take the emotional equivalent of a shit, in company, and then be able to allow us all to recover our dignities
Today I forgive:
Everything that never happened and was fuckin' well supposed to
To listen, at all, to the words other people are saying; instead of for everything else that might be about to go down
Today I am grateful:
For aeroplane and hospital food. A person, not me, is feeding me a reasonable meal at an appointed time regardless of where we are
Today I need:
To take the emotional equivalent of a shit, in company, and then be able to allow us all to recover our dignities
Today I forgive:
Everything that never happened and was fuckin' well supposed to
Last edited by Beany Boo on July 4th, 2016, 1:04 am, edited 5 times in total.
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
-
Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Today I learnt:
To share what is mine; I still morbidly loathe doing it but I know how much of what and when to
Today I am grateful:
That no one can see me, or if they can they're just respecting my belief that I've been discarded
Today I need:
For nothing to count as possible weight gain, behaviour addiction, intimacy avoidance or demise control
Today I forgive:
Anyone who treats me like an emotional toilet; they weren't to know
To share what is mine; I still morbidly loathe doing it but I know how much of what and when to
Today I am grateful:
That no one can see me, or if they can they're just respecting my belief that I've been discarded
Today I need:
For nothing to count as possible weight gain, behaviour addiction, intimacy avoidance or demise control
Today I forgive:
Anyone who treats me like an emotional toilet; they weren't to know
Last edited by Beany Boo on July 2nd, 2016, 9:11 am, edited 2 times in total.
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
-
brownblob
- Posts: 831
- Joined: January 22nd, 2016, 4:51 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: depression and anxiety
- preferred pronoun: whatshisname
Re: Dear Exposure
Just to let you know I'm reading your journal and you give me things to think about.
I don't like people much and they don't much like me. -A Beautiful Mind
I'm Homesick for a home I never had.--Soul Asylum "Homesick"
I'm Homesick for a home I never had.--Soul Asylum "Homesick"
-
Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Brownblob,
I appreciate you for taking the time, thank you.
I appreciate you for taking the time, thank you.
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
-
Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Today I learnt:
I'm not up to my neck in shit; I'm cheerfully doing the backstroke through it!
Today I am grateful:
I know how to pause, stay paused and for that to say everything
Today I need:
For life to hold no value, good or bad, whatsoever; its just some strange open-ended place with food in it, at certain points
Today I forgive:
My body, for bailing on my absurd expectations of it. From now on you're the boss
I'm not up to my neck in shit; I'm cheerfully doing the backstroke through it!
Today I am grateful:
I know how to pause, stay paused and for that to say everything
Today I need:
For life to hold no value, good or bad, whatsoever; its just some strange open-ended place with food in it, at certain points
Today I forgive:
My body, for bailing on my absurd expectations of it. From now on you're the boss
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
-
Beany Boo
- Posts: 2565
- Joined: June 13th, 2016, 3:18 am
- Gender: Not-quite-cis-male
- Issues: Risk averse, conversation difficulty, relationship difficulty
- preferred pronoun: He/him
Re: Dear Exposure
Today I learnt:
To just take longer, at everything, over and over and over
Today I am grateful:
I don't have to pretend to feel what I was told I'm supposed to feel; ever again
Today I need:
Everything else to accommodate my breathing
Today I forgive:
Sex, for being private, dignified and delicate. I was tricked into something else
To just take longer, at everything, over and over and over
Today I am grateful:
I don't have to pretend to feel what I was told I'm supposed to feel; ever again
Today I need:
Everything else to accommodate my breathing
Today I forgive:
Sex, for being private, dignified and delicate. I was tricked into something else
Mr (blue) B. Boo
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi
‘Out of nowhere the mind comes forth.’ - Zen koan
‘Let go or be dragged.’ - Zen proverb
‘Knowing how to yield is strength.’ - Laozi