One year since my dad died

[Procrastinator]

The one year anniversary of my dad's death is coming up in a few weeks. I was hit hard by his death, especially because my favorite aunt had died a couple of months before. I've been maintaining my life at the lowest basic level since then. I pay the bills (late), do the minimum amount of cleaning and laundry, have my kitchen just organized enough that I can fix cereal or a frozen dinner.

Last week I spoke to the NP who prescribes my psych meds about increasing my dose of Effexor; he said that I'm at the max. My research shows that is not exactly the case but the clinic I have to go to has strange rules about meds. He (reluctantly) added Wellbutrin at the lowest dose. I also take Gabapentin for anxiety as the clinic does not prescribe benzos.

Relatives have told me that what I'm experiencing is normal. I also should add that because my mother died when I was 4 years old I don't do well with loss.

I need to get myself to a grief support group but dragging myself to a meeting seems like more than I can do. I'm trying to stop beating myself up over wanting to recover from this loss on a timeline.

Suggestions appreciated.

[oak]

I am sorry for your loss.

Grief has its own timetable. There are no easy answers, unfortunately.

Thanks for sharing.