It's like my emotional processing is hijacked.

[somerandompaul]

I'm not sure how to put this. I've run into a problem where negative emotions lead to a cycle of negative thinking about myself. If I think about the death of a loved one it becomes my fault and I'm going to die all alone, etc. If I get cut off in traffic I'll think about how I've driven a lot worse and I'm a horrible person, etc. The self-denunciations could last for several minutes if I let them. It regularly reaches the point where I start yelling and hitting myself out of intense anger and hatred.

The pattern is so consistent and so automatic that my therapist thinks there's a biological component. He doesn't know what it is exactly though, and honestly doesn't know anyone he could refer me to.

Is there a term for this particular problem or behavior? Are there any viable treatments?

[manuel_moe_g]

Hello somerandompaul.

When I first took Prozac, it really helped with negative rumination and racing thoughts and intrusive thoughts. A pharmacological approach could be worthwhile.

Currently, I use my psychoactive drugs to keep me stable and to slightly raise my mood. Now my #1 approach to negative rumination and racing thoughts and intrusive thoughts is to journal my thoughts, and use the techniques of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy.

Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy; Steven C. Hayes

Some voices in my head are just silly. I write down their concerns, and I discover those voices are just about nagging and putting me down. Or they are just saying evil crazy stuff to hurt me. After writing it down and examining it, I am done with those voices and I can respectfully tell them to shove off.

Some voices of pain I have to hold like I would hold a sobbing child. I write down those down, and I honor the pain, and I try to maturely parent those voices. I hold them close and I tell them that I will not abandon them and I will lead them to a safer place, to the very best of my ability. Then I lead them by the hand or carry them in my arms.

Some voices are rational concerns. I write it down, and make a plan that is realistic with my energy level and focus and capability and anxiety level. Sometimes I have to maturely embrace failure. That is OK, the success that I am most interested in is continual improvement towards spiritual fulfillment.

I hope I heard what you were saying. I didn't mean to bully you with my own autobiography - you are the expert on your own experience. I honor your pain and I wish you relief because you don't deserve to feel this pain. Please take care, all the best, cheers!

[somerandompaul]

Thanks for your advice. I'll get the book as soon as possible.