My name is Emily and Ive never posted here before. First off, I want to say how much I appreciate a community like this. Its honestly beautiful, and humbling to see such huge amount of people coming together, giving advice, sharing stories, and offering support. I have struggled with depression for more of my life than I haven't, and a significant amount of it with various forms of anxiety as well. Well more than ready to move on, I have decided to do what it takes to just get out of this funk. I am a 26 year female with a full time teaching job. My dream is to travel the world.
I have seen multiple therapists since I was about 17. I quit for a couple years, too self absorbed to think there was a chance at getting over depression and anxiety. Now, I am seeing someone who is actually bringing me some nice relief, and I also am having some faith that this is manageable. I'm sure it will not come as a shock to many of you on here that my therapist has recommended the idea of an SSRI to accompany this therapy.
There are two things I want to point out here:
1) She is not being pushy about it. Its something that has come up in sessions and the decision has been left entirely up to me.
2) I have taken them before. It was many years ago though. I don't really remember what the effects were. (Early college, lots of partying). I also cant exactly pinpoint why I decided to stop. I think both the taking them and stopping them were more melodramatic, (see self-absorbed, above) moves than actually understanding the point of using them for my well being.
Since the last time I took an anti- depressant, other therapists have brought it up again. These were during some dark years. I had a hard time even showing up to therapy because I didn't want to just accept that I had some possible mental issues! And of course, taking medicine then was out of the question if I couldn't even admit I had a problem.
Now at this stage, while its been hard to come forward with all of my baggage, I really am much more ready to embrace the reality and just move on. I want to take the recommendation of an SSRI seriously. So here's where I need help.
I did a little googling but I easily get overwhelmed with website information. I would like to get some real, honest reviews from people who have taken any SSRI. My main points of curiosity, if its not apparent, are:
Which SSRI did you take?
How has it helped you?
If it didnt help, did you find yourself worse off?
Can you tell me about any negative side effects you experienced? (The ones I am most concerned about are weight gain and decreased libido)
Did you have withdrawal, or any negative side effects, if you took them and then got off?
There is more I want to know, but I do not want to overwhelm this community. To anyone who answers my questions, I just want to send an advanced thank-you. You have no idea how much it means to me to any get any answers back. I hope I have been as clear as possible and again, I really appreciate it. If there is anything I can do as well to make myself more understandable, please let me know.

Best,
Emily