Struggling

[ChicitaGatita]

I'm really struggling now. Not this morning, maybe not this evening but right now I am. My moods can change so quickly. Right now (and very often) I just don't want to be alive. Life seems too hard & either too boring or too overwhelming. It is so freakin awful feeling this way. I want to stuff my face with doughnuts & have a sugar/carb induced coma. But I'm on a low carb high fat diet and want to lose 10 pounds. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

[manuel_moe_g]

You are not alone. Take care, keep the lines of communication open.

[ChicitaGatita]

Thanks Manuel. I'm struggling this afternoon as well. I find it so hard that I can go from happy to exhausted go suicidal to okay in the space of four hours.

[ChicitaGatita]

Hi. I've been feeling very low the last 24 hours. Some childhood trauma was triggered this weekend. One of my sisters & I fought & it was ugly. I feel shame & despair.

[AndyLand]

Those childhood wounds are so powerful. I thank my lucky stars often that I'm an only child because my youth was complicated enough! I hope you are doing something to nurture yourself. Maybe write it all out? What was triggered that is. Helps to share it. For what it's worth, I'm here, and I'm listening. Warm Regards

[Cheesehead]

It can be so exhausting to me to have the mood swings...I am so sick and tired of having stupid stuff affect how I feel every day all day long. Sick and tired of the negative feelings and having to try to fight them in my head all the while trying to make my outward appearence as good. Sick and tired of of being mad and pissed off over the little things and feeling absolutely crazy because I am so affected by stuff when everyone else can just let it run off their back. That's probably what irritates me the most is that the littlest things can affect me so much and I just can't let go off it!!

[Rain]

Are there anyone in your lives you feel you can trust totally? If so, is it possible to describe your feelings to them, then follow their advice, whether it feels right or not? After following their advice, hopefully ignoring your inner turmoil, reassess the situation. If they were right, and things straightened out, try to see how their advice differed from what you’d have tried.

Keep in mind, the people you trust can not fix everything. And you don’t need to let them know how painful life can be for you, they no doubt get that. If you could build a network of such friends, learn to let your guard down and following through on their advice, a pattern might develop in that you begin to figure ways out on your own. Less painful or destructive ways of dealing with the the crap life throws at us.

Also remember that not every bit of advice or guidance works. And if it doesn't, don’t write-off your trusted adviser, just regroup and try something different. A lot more of the world is on your side than you likely realize. Not everything or everyone is trying to take advantage of us, though humans can be recklessly competitive. If you falter, relax, we all fall down What I’ve learned from Paul’s Pod’s are how much alike everyone actually is (thanks Paul), and how people really do care, if we let them.