*waves*
I'm in a hole. Thanks for peering in. I'm not always a sour little pessimistic turd but on nights like tonight, I get a bit stinky.
I'm a CSA survivor. One therapist has remarked that I'm "over-adjusted" so realistically, I tend to function like a "normal" human.
The last few days though...not so much. My marriage is at risk. I can't initiate important conversations. I can't stand up for myself. I question my existence and its value.
I'm hopefully going to meet up with a third therapist on Sunday, to eventually try an EMDR session.
But tonight...tonight all I have is you, dear internet.
*tips hat
In the Darkness, I'm Reaching Out
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Blurry Face
- Posts: 1
- Joined: October 13th, 2019, 2:35 am
- Gender: Female
- Issues: Childhood incest/ sexual abuse, binge eating, daily marijuana use.
- preferred pronoun: She
Re: In the Darkness, I'm Reaching Out
Hi! Wow I feel like I just read my own post! I’m a CSA survivor as well and I definitely struggle with making my needs known or feeling like anyone in my life owes me anything.
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snoringdog
- Posts: 1555
- Joined: April 23rd, 2019, 5:49 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: anxiety, depression, automatic negative thoughts, intrusive thoughts, SAD.
- preferred pronoun: "Good Boy!"
- Location: USA
Re: In the Darkness, I'm Reaching Out
Hello Blurry,
Hello and welcome! Hope you can find help.
Making your needs known, yes that is hard sometimes, right? I sometimes avoid doing that, thinking it'll cause confrontation or that I'll be a nuisance, etc etc.
But usually if I just do it calmly before any sort of internal pressure builds up, it usually ends well with a discussion and resolution.
And remember that no one owes you anything but dignity and respect!
Wishing you well,
Snoring Dog
Hello and welcome! Hope you can find help.
Making your needs known, yes that is hard sometimes, right? I sometimes avoid doing that, thinking it'll cause confrontation or that I'll be a nuisance, etc etc.
But usually if I just do it calmly before any sort of internal pressure builds up, it usually ends well with a discussion and resolution.
And remember that no one owes you anything but dignity and respect!
Wishing you well,
Snoring Dog
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kmac88
- Posts: 1
- Joined: November 18th, 2019, 1:34 pm
- Issues: Anxiety, Depression, PTSD, childhood sexual abuse
Re: In the Darkness, I'm Reaching Out
Hi lovely!
Fellow CSA survivor here too. Over 20 years after the fact, I'm still learning the ways my body and mind remember what happened and how that's impacted my boundaries, my relationships, and how I think/feel about myself. Nothing is more unfair than having something so shitty happen to you, something that was not at all your fault, and having it come back to haunt you at the most inopportune moments. Here's hoping your partner is willing to work with you to figure out what you both need. Sending you positive energy and SOOOOOO much love. Focus on those tiny victories/joys. <3
Fellow CSA survivor here too. Over 20 years after the fact, I'm still learning the ways my body and mind remember what happened and how that's impacted my boundaries, my relationships, and how I think/feel about myself. Nothing is more unfair than having something so shitty happen to you, something that was not at all your fault, and having it come back to haunt you at the most inopportune moments. Here's hoping your partner is willing to work with you to figure out what you both need. Sending you positive energy and SOOOOOO much love. Focus on those tiny victories/joys. <3