If you think or know you're autistic and you ID as female or NB...

[techchick]

Welcome to the forums. This is a super supportive place.

If you're new to your diagnosis or if you simply suspect you're autistic...

I'm an autistic woman, late DXed, so I've had a lot of reading and learning to catch up on.

To start with I would recommend these books: Women and Girls on the Autism Spectrum by Sarah Hendrickx (that's not a typo) and Spectrum Women (ed. Barb Cook and Michelle Garnet).

I wish I knew of books specific to nonbinary folks or to trans folks... that's a gap in the literature IMO. The books I mentioned are more oriented toward cis women and girls, but I have not found transphobic content in either.

The Facebook private groups Autistic Adults with ADHD and Why did I walk into this room? offer compassion and support the way only a roomful of auties can do for each other. Can't recommend them enough.

I usually post about my treatment and care plan over in the How Do You Feel Right Now viewforum.php?f=23 forum. I've decided to seek medical treatment because I'm menopausal and I struggle with much more depression, emotional volatility, and focus trouble than I used to. Apparently this is super common among menopausal autistic women. I'm just starting my journey with treatment as I type this.

Autistic women, girls, and nonbinary folks are welcome to PM me.

[RightInTwo]

I understand that autism is a spectrum; do you think it’s possible for someone to be persistently undiagnosed because the symptoms are just not severe enough?

I have extreme social issues, since childhood. I have thought for quite some time, that I might have aspergers. Extremely rare for women, but I took a test (online but it seemed legit) and the results were mostly negative except for the social issues.

I wish I could get a more specific diagnosis, not just “anxiety and depression” but no doctors ever take me seriously.

I’ll look for those books.

[oak]

Thank you for sharing!

[kookaburra]

Hi! Thanks for sharing. I'm curious, if you don't mind sharing, to know if you are taking medication for your depression or anxiety. You mentioned you're menopausal. I am, too, and I was expecting a much bumpier ride through this, but I've been taking medication since 2003 (started at age 33), and I think this has helped me avoid the worst of those issues. I already had emotional volatility, for example, which is one reason I went on a med. I asked my gyno two years ago, when I was still having periods, how much I needed to worry about preventing emotional volatility and she said the fact that I already take an antidepressant automatically helps a lot. Btw, I took sertraline for about 12 years and then switched to duloxetine 3 years ago because I felt the sertraline had plateaued. Everyone's chemistry varies, of course; just FYI FWIW.

[RightInTwo]

Hi kookaburra

I am not on anything for anxiety/depression, and haven’t been since before menopause hit. Doctors here (US) won’t listen when I tell them that their favorite medicine doesn’t work for me. So, I just quit taking it, and literally ~nothing~ changed.

I am on vyvanse for ADD, and I smoke weed at night & it does wonders for my anxiety, lightens my mood, and puts me to sleep like a baby!

Between those two things, and hormone replacement therapy, the worst menopause symptom I ever had was getting hot at night, but even that could have been (at least partly) environmental and not entirely menopausal. It’s hot as hell where I live, nearly all year.

I highly recommend hormone replacement. I did some research, and I learned that it actually might prevent some health issues. I also learned that the term “bioidentical” is essentially meaningless; it’s a marketing term from the pharma companies. So no need to worry about which hormones to take, if you do decide to go that direction.

Hope this helps!

[kookaburra]

Thanks so much for the great information!